Leaders Need These 3 Things Early in their Career
It’s 3am and you’re awake. Again. It’s the third night this week and it’s only Thursday. Your mind just won’t turn off despite all the advice and actions you make during waking hours. You exercise, take standing breaks, reach out to others to talk through tough issues, watch your diet, limit caffeine and alcohol so as not to become dependent on them to bring your energy up and down at the certain times. You are textbook, or pretty damn close. And yet, your sleep, or lack thereof is sending you a different message. How are you really doing as a leader?
Many people choose to become leaders because they want to create positive change. Some are drawn to the role early while others work for years and then get tapped on the shoulder to take a position. However you came to a leadership position, there are three things I have found surprising in the role. These are ways of being, I did not predict before becoming a C-Suite leader. I learned them from the experience of leading.
Here are the three important strategies I realized were key to becoming a successful leader.
I realized I was no longer just a member of the team.
I had to quickly distinguish between people who were confidants versus collaborators.
I had to find outside support systems.
#1 No longer just a member of the team.
This one took me a while to get over. I knew logically that when I entered a C-Suite role that I would be running the team, and not just a member of the team. I was good at sharing power, collaborating, and being a team player. So, I decided I could have more of a hybrid role as a leader: leading sometimes and allowing the team to lead at other times with me assuming a “member” role having no more or less power than anyone else. I think there is a lot of benefit to this kind of leadership, but and this is a big BUT, if you are the leader, you are always the leader. No amount of “shared” leadership will disrupt this fact. At the end of the day, at the crucial time to make a final decision, that job will land on you. You can get advice and input, and you should, from many people around you. But the ultimate decision will be yours. The responsibility, the accountability, and the final call are yours to make.
You also have to be careful about how you communicate when you think you are being a “member” of the team you supervise. Your ideas are not just brainstorming. Your team may see your ideas as directives, because, after all, you are the boss. Be careful about how you contribute to all conversations. You must never forget that you are the leader, even if you think in that moment you are just offering ideas, like you normally would if you are a member of the team. I’m not saying that you can’t have an idea sharing role with your team, but you should explicitly state that your ideas are not to be weighted heavier than other ideas around the table. This responsibility is yours, not the teams.
#2 Distinguish between confidants and collaborators.
Early on in my leadership role, I confused these two types of people. A confidant is someone who is supportive of YOU while a collaborator is supportive of your IDEA or PROJECT. This is a very large difference. Think about the people around you. Who would support you, even if they disagreed with your idea or decision? Who can you always count on to listen, and lend an ear? That person, or if you’re lucky, more than one person will hold a coveted position as a confidant.
NOTE: you will not have very many people you count as a confidant in your inner circle. And that’s ok. You don’t need very many of these kinds of people. And hey, you also may have a confidant that you actually pay to support you in this way like a leadership coach.
A collaborator is someone who aligns with you on a topic or issue. They will help you build that idea into action. They will be an advocate, a liaison, and an indispensable member of your team. FOR THAT TOPIC OR IDEA. Do not think that just because you have a common project that the collaborator will support everything you propose. They may love the new plans for the office renovation for instance, but absolutely reject your ideas around a new time off policy for employees. If you count on collaborators to always support you, no matter what, you will find yourself standing alone one day, when the heat has turned up on an project.
#3 Find outside support systems.
If you are a good leader, you will have many people on the inside you care about, who care about you in return. You may even have a couple of confidants on the inside. Likely you will have many collaborators. Even with this level of support and camaraderie, you are still going to need something else.
You want to build an outside support system. This can be formal or informal and look a lot of different ways. For instance, you could join a group of other leaders who become a peer group. You could hire a coach to work with you on the areas of your leadership that need further developing. I have also found retired C-Suite leaders from other industries to be excellent confidants and mentors. There are several advantages to retired leaders: they have a lot of knowledge and passion, and likely have time they are willing to devote to coaching a younger generation of leaders. Often they bring hard, technical skills, as well as emotional intelligence training from lessons learned, mistakes made, and stories (and how to create) wildly successful ventures.
I recommend these three strategies for leadership, no matter where you are on your leadership journey. Oh, and that 3am wakeup time? Could be your mind telling you that one of these strategies is missing from your toolbox.
